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Revision as of 19:11, 17 August 2022
Niveau d'aptitude
3
An
2005
Version
29.09.2025
Autorité approbatrice
Conférence Générale
 |
This honor is available only to clubs outside the North American Division. For those inside the North American Division, use the Crisis Intervention honor instead. |
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When your friend is facing a crisis that is too big for you to handle, you need to refer him to someone with professional training. Doing this is not abandoning your friend, but rather, recognizing that his problems are beyond your ability to help. There are four steps in making a referral:
- Prepare your friend
- Before you can prepare your friend, you are going to need a lot of information about the services professional offers and have a concrete understanding of how it can help. Then you need to share that information with your friend. Assure your friend that seeking professional help is not a sign of weakness. Rather, it is often the most effective and least painful path to recovery.
- Get your friend's participation
- The decision to see a professional belongs to your friend, not to you. Do not pressure your friend into making this decision. It may take some getting used to, and the decision might take a long time to make.
- Prepare the professional
- Once your friend has decided to see the professional, you should call and talk to them. Do not make the appointment for your friend. Ideally your friend should to that for himself, but if the situation is especially urgent, you might make the appointment for your friend yourself. When you speak to the professional, tell them as much as you are comfortable about the situation, and why you think the referral is important. The more the counselor knows about the problem, the better able he will be to help. Make sure that the things you have told your friend about the professional hold true, and ask if they think they can really help.
- Follow up
- After your friend's first appointment, ask how it went. You do not need to pry into the details of the session, but you should certainly ask if there is anything you can do to help your friend. Your continued support can help ensure a positive outcome.
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The point of this requirement is for the individual to examine his own reasons for wanting to help someone. Unfortunately, there are many more bad reasons to want to get involved than there are good reasons. The only valid reason to get involved is out of love. Invalid reasons include curiosity, the desire to gossip, the desire to feel better about oneself for helping, or out of a sense of wanting to control the other person's life. Sometimes people think that their friends cannot get themselves out of their mess without their help. There are almost certainly more invalid reasons for getting involved than those listed here. But that doesn't mean you should not get involved. Just be sure you are doing so for the right reason!
Historical Note
This honor was previously called Crisis Intervention. In 2009 it was renamed Conflict Resolution and somewhat rewritten. Much of it is the same as before, but there are some major differences.
References
- How to Help a Friend (second edition) by Paul Welter, Tyndale House, Wheaton, Illinois (1991)
- Christ-Centered Caring by Ronaele Whittington, AdventSource, Lincoln, Nebraska (1990)
- Mind Tools: Conflict Resolution
