Difference between revisions of "AY Honors/Conflict Resolution/Answer Key"

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<!-- 1. Explain how Christ encouraged people in conflict in the following Bible stories. Identify the nature of the conflict or human needs in each story that you explain. -->
  
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<code></code>'''Maslow's hierarchy of needs''' is a theory in [[psychology]], proposed by [[Abraham Maslow]] in his 1943 paper ''A Theory of Human Motivation'',<ref name="multiple">A.H. Maslow, ''[http://psychclassics.yorku.ca/Maslow/motivation.htm A Theory of Human Motivation]'', Psychological Review 50 (1943):370-96.</ref> which he subsequently extended to include his observations of humans' innate curiosity.
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{{Bible verse
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|book = John
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|chapter=8
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|verse=1-11
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|version = NIV
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|text=<br>
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<sup>1</sup>But Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. <sup>2</sup>At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. <sup>3</sup>The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group <sup>4</sup>and said to Jesus, "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. <sup>5</sup>In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?" <sup>6</sup>They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.
  
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Maslow studied, what he called, exemplary people such as [[Albert Einstein]], [[Jane Addams]], [[Eleanor Roosevelt]], and [[Frederick Douglass]] rather than [[mentally ill]] or [[neurotic]] people, writing that "the study of crippled, stunted, immature, and unhealthy specimens can yield only a cripple psychology and a cripple philosophy."<ref>{{cite book|last=Maslow|first=Abraham|title=Motivation and Personality|date=1954}}New York:. Harper. p. 236.</ref> Maslow also studied the healthiest one percent of the college student population. In his book, ''TheHuman Nature'', Maslow writes, "By ordinary standards of this kind of laboratory research... this simply was not research at all.  My generalizations grew out of my selection of certain kinds of people.  Obviously, other judges are needed."<ref>Maslow, A.H. (1971). The farther reaches of human nature. New York: Penguin Compass. Chpt 3, "Self-actualizing and beyond", p. 41.</ref>
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But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. <sup>7</sup>When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." <sup>8</sup>Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.
  
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== Representations ==
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[[Image:Maslow's hierarchy of needs.svg|thumb|right|400px|This diagram shows Maslow's hierarchy of needs, represented as a pyramid with the more primitive needs at the bottom.<ref>[http://honolulu.hawaii.edu/intranet/committees/FacDevCom/guidebk/teachtip/maslow.htm Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs]</ref>]]
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<sup>9</sup>At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. <sup>10</sup>Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"
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Maslow's hierarchy of needs is often depicted as a pyramid consisting of five levels: the four lower levels are grouped together as being associated with Physiological needs, while the top level is termed growth needs associated with psychological needs. Deficiency needs must be met first. Once these are met, seeking to satisfy growth needs drives personal growth.
 
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The higher needs in this hierarchy only come into focus when the lower needs in the pyramid are satisfied. Once an individual has moved upwards to the next level, needs in the lower level will no longer be prioritized. If a lower set of needs is no longer being met, the individual will temporarily re-prioritize those needs by focusing attention on the unfulfilled needs, but will not permanently regress to the lower level. For instance, a businessman at the esteem level who is diagnosed with cancer will spend a great deal of time concentrating on his health (physiological needs), but will continue to value his work performance (esteem needs) and will likely return to work during periods of remission.
 
  
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== Deficiency needs ==
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The first four layers of the pyramid are what Maslow called "deficiency needs" or "D-needs": if they are not met, the body gives no indication of it physically, but the individual feels anxious and tense. The deficiency needs are: survival needs, safety and security, love and belonging, and esteem.
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<sup>11</sup>"No one, sir," she said.
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:"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."
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}}
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The woman in this story was Mary Magdalene, and she was certainly experiencing a crisis. Not only was she publicly shamed, but her very life was threatened. The trap laid by the Pharisees here was that Mosaic Law called for the execution of an adultress, but under Roman Law, the decision to execute was reserved for the Roman governors. If Jesus were to agree that she should be executed, they would have turned Him in to the Roman authorities for usurping their authority. But if He disagreed with the death sentence, they would have "proven" that he did not respect Mosaic Law.
  
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==== Physiological needs ====
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These are the basic human needs for such things as sex, warmth, water, and other bodily needs. If a person is hungry or thirsty or their body is chemically unbalanced, all of their energies turn toward remedying these deficiencies and other needs remain inactive. Maslow explains that "Anyone who attempts to make an emergency picture into a typical one and who will measure all of man's goals and desires by his[her] behavior during extreme physiological deprivation, is certainly blind to many things. It is quite true that man lives by bread alone — when there is no bread".<ref name="multiple">A.H. Maslow, ''A Theory of Human Motivation'', Psychological Review 50 (1943):370-96.</ref>
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Jesus saw this trap immediately, but His main concern was not for himself but for Mary Magdalene. Yes, she had sinned, but so have we all, and His mission was to save sinners. Jesus extricated Himself from the trap while showing her great tenderness and compassion. His writing in the dirt was a list of "secret" sins committed by her accusers. He continued outlining these sins until all the accusers drifted away, eager for their own sins to be kept secret.
  
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The physiological needs of the [[organism]] (those enabling [[homeostasis]]) take first precedence. These consist mainly of (in order of importance):
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Finally, He turned to Mary, counseled her to leave her life of sin and granted her forgiveness. She followed Him devoutly after this incident, washing His feet with perfume at the home of Simon, and standing at the foot of the cross during the crucifixion. She was the first person to see Him after the resurrection.
  
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*Breathing
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*Drinking
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*Eating
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*Excretion
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*Sleep
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*Sex
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{{Bible verse
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If some needs are not fulfilled, a person's physiological needs take the highest priority. Physiological needs can control thoughts and behaviors and can cause people to feel sickness, pain, and discomfort.
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|book = Matthew
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|chapter = 18
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|verse = 1-6
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|version = NIV
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|text = <br>
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<sup>1</sup>At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?"
  
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==== Safety needs ====
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With their physical needs relatively satisfied, the individual's safety needs take over and dominate their behavior. These needs have to do with people's yearning for a predictable, orderly world in which injustice and inconsistency are under control, the familiar frequent and the unfamiliar rare. In the world of work, these safety needs manifest themselves in such things as a preference for job security, grievance procedures for protecting the individual from unilateral authority, savings accounts, insurance policies, and the like.  
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<sup>2</sup>He called a little child and had him stand among them. <sup>3</sup>And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. <sup>4</sup>Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
  
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For the most part, physiological and safety needs are reasonably well satisfied in the "First World". The obvious exceptions, of course, are people outside the mainstream — the poor and the disadvantaged. If frustration has not led to apathy and weakness, such people still struggle to satisfy the basic physiological and safety needs. They are primarily concerned with survival: obtaining adequate food, clothing, shelter, and seeking justice from the dominant societal groups.
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<sup>5</sup>"And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. <sup>6</sup>But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.
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}}
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The people in crisis in this verse are the disciples, only they did not realize that they were in any danger. They were looking for Jesus to settle their disagreement over which of ''them'' was the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Their arrogance and pride were threatening their very salvation!
  
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Safety and Security needs include:
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Jesus clearly pointed their error out to them in a most non-threatening way. When we see someone we love on a course to destruction, it is our duty to try to set them straight as well. However, the ''way'' we do this is just as important as the decision to do it. Jesus did not jump up and down and scream, nor did He insult His disciples and tell them they were ruining their lives (even if they were). Rather, He gently pointed out the way they ''should'' have been acting and admonished them to follow the example He set before them.
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{{Bible verse
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|book = 1 Kings
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|chapter=3
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|verse=16-28
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|version=NIV
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|text=
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Now two prostitutes came to the king and stood before him. One of them said, "My lord, this woman and I live in the same house. I had a baby while she was there with me. The third day after my child was born, this woman also had a baby. We were alone; there was no one in the house but the two of us.
  
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* Personal security from [[crime]]
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* Financial security
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"During the night this woman's son died because she lay on him. So she got up in the middle of the night and took my son from my side while I your servant was asleep. She put him by her breast and put her dead son by my breast. The next morning, I got up to nurse my son—and he was dead! But when I looked at him closely in the morning light, I saw that it wasn't the son I had borne."
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* Health and well-being
 
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* Safety net against accidents/illness and the adverse impacts
 
  
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==== Social needs ====
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After physiological and safety needs are fulfilled, the third layer of human needs is social. This psychological aspect of Maslow's hierarchy involves emotionally-based relationships in general, such as:
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The other woman said, "No! The living one is my son; the dead one is yours."
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::But the first one insisted, "No! The dead one is yours; the living one is mine." And so they argued before the king.
  
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* [[friendship]]
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* [[intimacy]]
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The king said, "This one says, 'My son is alive and your son is dead,' while that one says, 'No! Your son is dead and mine is alive.' "
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* having a supportive and communicative [[family]]
 
  
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Humans  need to feel a sense of belonging and acceptance, whether it comes from a large social group, such as clubs, office culture, [[Religion|religious groups]], professional organizations, sports teams, [[gangs]] ("[[Safety in numbers]]"), or small social connections (family members, intimate partners, mentors, close colleagues, confidants). They need to love and be loved (sexually and non-sexually) by others.  In the absence of these elements, many people become susceptible to [[loneliness]], [[social anxiety]], and [[Clinical depression]]. This need for belonging can often overcome the physiological and security needs, depending on the strength of the peer pressure; an anorexic, for example, ignores the need to eat and the security of health for a feeling of control and belonging.
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<!--T:17-->
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Then the king said, "Bring me a sword." So they brought a sword for the king. He then gave an order: "Cut the living child in two and give half to one and half to the other."
  
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==== Esteem needs ====
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All humans have a need to be respected, to have self-esteem, self-respect, and to respect others. People need to engage themselves to gain recognition and have an activity or activities that give the person a sense of contribution, to feel accepted and self-valued, be it in a profession or hobby. Imbalances at this level can result in low self-esteem or inferiority complexes. People with low self-esteem need respect from others. They may seek fame or glory, which again depends on others. It may be noted, however, that many people with low self-esteem will not be able to improve their view of themselves simply by receiving fame, respect, and glory externally, but must first accept themselves internally.  Psychological imbalances such as depression can also prevent one from obtaining self-esteem on both levels.
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The woman whose son was alive was filled with compassion for her son and said to the king, "Please, my lord, give her the living baby! Don't kill him!"
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::But the other said, "Neither I nor you shall have him. Cut him in two!"
  
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== Growth needs ==
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<!--T:19-->
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Though the deficiency needs may be seen as "basic", and can be met and neutralized (i.e. they stop being motivators in one's life), self-actualization and transcendence are "being" or "growth" needs (also termed "B-needs"); i.e. they are enduring motivations or drivers of behavior.
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Then the king gave his ruling: "Give the living baby to the first woman. Do not kill him; she is his mother."
  
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== Aesthetic needs ==
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<!--T:20-->
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Based on Maslow's beliefs, it is stated in the hierarchy humans need beautiful imagery or something new and aesthetically pleasing to continue towards Self-Actualization. Humans need to refresh themselves in the presence and beauty of nature while carefully absorbing and observing their surroundings to extract the beauty the world has to offer.
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When all Israel heard the verdict the king had given, they held the king in awe, because they saw that he had wisdom from God to administer justice.
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}}
  
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==Criticisms==
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<!--T:21-->
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This story is a primary reason Solomon was considered the wisest man to ever live. By setting up a scenario that forced both mothers to choose he deduced which was the true mother.
  
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While Maslow's theory was regarded as an improvement over previous theories of [[personality psychology|personality]] and [[motivation]], it had its detractors. For example, in their extensive review of research which is dependent on Maslow's theory, Wahba and Bridgewell<ref>{{cite journal
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  | coauthors = Bridgewell, L
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  | title = Maslow reconsidered: A review of research on the need hierarchy theory
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  | journal = Organizational Behavior and Human Performance
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  | volume =
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<!-- 2. Discuss relationship, identity, racial, and cultural conflicts that teenagers in your community face today. (i.e. Relationship with parents, self esteem, friendships).-->
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  | issue = 15
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Teenagers are humans (contrary to some rumours) and therefore are subject to the same human needs as shown on the pyramid. However, as people in transition to an adult world, teenagers face additional decisions and challenges. With less experience in handling crisis situations than older people, teenagers may need to learn tools and skills to cope with life. Families are also comprised of humans who must function in relationships with each other. Families with teenagers are in for an interesting time as their teenagers grow up, leave home, study, find love and enter the workforce.
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  | pages = 212–240
 
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  | date = 1976
 
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  | url =
 
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  | doi =
 
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  | id =
 
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  | accessdate =  }}</ref> found little evidence for the ranking of needs Maslow described, or even for the existence of a definite hierarchy at all.  Conducted in 2002, a recent study forwards this line of thought, claiming that "the hierarchy of needs is nothing more than a fool's daydream; there is no possible way to classify ever-changing needs as society changes"<ref>{{cite journal
 
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  | last = Lim
 
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  | first = Cwisfa
 
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  | authorlink =
 
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  | coauthors = Khruschev, Vesh
 
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  | title = Maslow's Pyramid - a necessity?
 
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  | volume =
 
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  | issue = 12
 
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  | pages = 15-17
 
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  | date = 2002
 
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  | url =
 
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  | doi =
 
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  | id =
 
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  | accessdate =  }}</ref>. {{Verify credibility| Fake Sources|date=September 2008}}Chilean economist and philosopher [[Manfred Max Neef]] has also argued [[fundamental human needs]] are non-hierarchical, and are [[ontology|ontologically]] universal and invariant in nature - part of the condition of being human; [[poverty]], he argues, is the result of any one of these needs being frustrated, denied or unfulfilled.
 
  
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== References==
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<!--T:53-->
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{{reflist}}
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Once they get into a discussion, Teenagers will, however, focus on the human needs that are most pressing for them.
  
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==See also==
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<!--T:54-->
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*[[ERG theory]] that further expands this theory
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Discussion topics may include:
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*[[John Curtis Gowan]]
 
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*[[Self actualization]]
 
  
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== External links == 
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<!--T:55-->
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* [http://www.teacherstoolbox.co.uk/maslow.html Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs], Teacher's Toolbox. A video overview of Maslow's work by Geoff Petty.
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*Divorce and family recombinations that place stress on family members
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* [http://psychclassics.yorku.ca/Maslow/motivation.htm A Theory of Human Motivation].
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*Decisions about school and career
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* [http://emotionalliteracyeducation.com/abraham-maslow-theory-human-motivation.shtml A Theory of Human Motivation: Annotated].
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*Job loss and economic crisis in the family
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* [http://www.ship.edu/~cgboeree/maslow.html Theory and biography] including detailed description and examples of self-actualizers.
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*Dating and romance
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* [http://www.Maslow.org  Maslow Nidus] Maslow Collection including current theorizing.
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*Self esteem challenges
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* [http://chiron.valdosta.edu/whuitt/col/regsys/maslow.html Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs], Valdosta.
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*Suicide thoughts
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* [http://webspace.ship.edu/cgboer/maslow.html Abraham Maslow] by C George Boeree
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*Peer pressure to try illegal, unhealthy or immoral things
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* [http://www.thewiseturtle.com/hierarchyofneeds.html Hierarchy of Needs] Maslow's hierarchy integrated into Ken Wilber's AQAL Theory
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*Family violence and other types of abuse
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*Loss of a family member or loved one
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*etc
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Often in any crisis whether it be a wide area disaster or the loss of a close family member the emotional crisis can be devastating to an individual. Not all people are emotionally equipped to react and continue to even function when facing what many would call an overwhelming situation. For these people immediate assistance is needed as they may have frozen themselves in a dangerous location, may become depressed even to the point of suicidal or may react in outrage and violent fashion.
  
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[[Category:Consumer behaviour]]
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<!--T:56-->
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[[Category:Human development]]
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To help to bring these reactions to a close or to a point controllable first the person must be helped to a place physically and mentally where they are not in immediate danger and they must be helped to realize this. In the case of the loss of a parent this may mean that the teen is helped to realize that they have many friends, and family, a community that will help them to go on and provide for their needs.
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[[Category:Interpersonal relationships]]
 
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[[Category:Organizational studies and human resource management]]
 
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[[Category:Personal development]]
 
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[[Category:Personal life]]
 
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[[Category:Motivational theories]]
 
  
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[[ar:تدرج الحاجات]]
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[[ca:Abraham Maslow]]
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The human needs of any individual start with the same basics: shelter, water, and food. As Christians we recognize the need first for God and our relationship with Him and will remind those we help to keep this need first in all things. Beyond these basic needs there are possibly physical, medical, and emotional support needs that will be considered. A person injured in the fire that has destroyed his home needs medical attention before he needs emotional support (although the two may come nearly simultaneously at times). In professional occupations that deal with high stress matters or regular human suffering the emotional support to follow is most often called Critical Incident Stress Debriefing. This is a form of counseling that is important not only to professionals like firefighters but also to families and communities in need.
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[[da:Maslows behovspyramide]]
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[[de:Maslowsche Bedürfnispyramide]]
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[[et:Inimvajaduste hierarhia]]
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The stress of an incident can be overwhelming and may manifest itself some great time later or be a fixture in a person's actions and outlook to life. Although not all people are affected by such stress it is best to see to the potential needs of a person in crisis to avert the possible self destruction that may come. In this we consider not only what a person says they are feeling and facing, not only what they have gone through, but in the long term what they are like today vs. the person they were before their crisis.
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[[es:Pirámide de Maslow]]
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[[eo:Maslova piramido]]
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[[fr:Pyramide des besoins de Maslow]]
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In immediate intervention you will be a shoulder to lean on, someone to offer support, to be yelled at, to be cried to. You will offer encouragement and help to arrange for those basic needs of shelter, water, and food. You will report to your "supervisor" in intervention any issue you observe that may need to be referred to professional counseling. You will be a friend.
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[[hr:Humanistička psihologija]]
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[[it:Piramide di Maslow]]
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<!--T:60-->
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[[he:תאוריית הצרכים]]
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Families face a variety of crisis situations and some things that some may not consider to be a crisis can be devastating. For this purpose we will list common crisis situations:
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[[nl:Piramide van Maslow]]
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*House fire
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[[ja:自己実現理論]]
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*Death of a loved one
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[[no:Maslows behovspyramide]]
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*Loss of income
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[[pl:Hierarchia potrzeb]]
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*Terminal disease
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[[pt:Hierarquia de necessidades de Maslow]]
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*Birth Defects
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[[ru:Пирамида потребностей по Маслоу]]
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*Multiple Births (quintuplets for example, imagine five kids at one time could be stressful)
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[[sk:Maslowova pyramída]]
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*Serious Injury
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[[fi:Maslow'n tarvehierarkia]]
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*Natural Disaster
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[[sv:Behovshierarki]]
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[[ta:மாஸ்லோவின் தேவை படியமைப்பு கோட்பாடு]]
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<!-- 3. Describe types of human needs and give a real-life example of each. -->
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[[File:Maslow's hierarchy of needs.png|thumb|center|800px|Maslow's hierarchy of needs]]
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{{clear}}
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Maslow's hierarchy of needs is often depicted as a pyramid consisting of five levels: the four lower levels are grouped together as being associated with Physiological needs, while the top level is termed growth needs associated with psychological needs. Deficiency needs must be met first. Once these are met, seeking to satisfy growth needs drives personal growth. The higher needs in this hierarchy only come into focus when the lower needs in the pyramid are satisfied. Once an individual has moved upwards to the next level, needs in the lower level will no longer be prioritized. If a lower set of needs is no longer being met, the individual will temporarily re-prioritize those needs by focusing attention on the unfulfilled needs, but will not permanently regress to the lower level. For instance, a businessman at the esteem level who is diagnosed with cancer will spend a great deal of time concentrating on his health (physiological needs), but will continue to value his work performance (esteem needs) and will likely return to work during periods of remission.
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<!-- 4. What is active listening? Practice active listening by role playing conflicts noted in #2. -->
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When interacting, people often are not listening attentively to one another. They may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what they are going to say next, (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements).
 +
 
 +
<!--T:25-->
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Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others. It focuses attention on the speaker. Suspending one’s own frame of reference and suspending judgment are important in order to fully attend to the speaker.
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 +
<!--T:26-->
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It is important to observe the other person's behavior and body language. Having heard, the listener may then paraphrase the speaker’s words. It is important to note that the listener is not necessarily agreeing with the speaker—simply stating what was said. In emotionally charged communications, the listener may listen for feelings. Thus, rather than merely repeating what the speaker has said, the active listener might describe the underlying emotion (“you seem to feel angry” or “you seem to feel frustrated, is that because…?”).
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<!--T:27-->
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Individuals in conflict often contradict one another. This has the effect of denying the validity of the other person’s position. Either party may react defensively, and they may lash out or withdraw. On the other hand, if one finds that the other partly understands, an atmosphere of cooperation can be created. This increases the possibility of collaborating and resolving the conflict.
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When setting the scene the two parties in conflict come together. It is important to listen to the other side without interjecting defenses of your own position. Otherwise this will descend into an argument and nothing will be resolved. Use active listening techniques, meaning you repeat your understanding of what has just been said to you. If your understanding is incorrect, the person whose views you have misconstrued will let you know. Be careful that active listening does not become ''arguing''.
 +
 
 +
<!--T:29-->
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Pay special attention to the interests of the other party. Find out what their concerns are. Keep in mind that they may have valid objections to the solution you wish to put forward, and that it is very possible that you yourself could be wrong.
 +
 
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When presenting your side of the story emphasize that you are relating your ''perception'' of the problem. The goal here is to get the other party to recognize your concerns and interests.
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Both sides have presented their perception of the problem and have stated their interests and goals. Now it is time to explore these viewpoints.
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In this phase you are trying to clarify exactly what the problem is. It is very possible that up to this point the two parties have been arguing over two different issues. Try to come up with a mutually agreed statement of the problem.
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Once the parties have agreed on a definition of the problem, it is time to start putting out possible solutions. No solution should be judged at this point, as doing so will inhibit the flow of ideas. Write every idea down, no matter how crazy it seems. By not judging the solutions at this point, the floor is open to everyone present. Be sure that everyone there is engaged and is presenting ideas. The less assertive will resist this, especially if ideas are being shot down as they are presented.
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Use the method outlined in the previous requirement. Once you have come up with several solutions, evaluate them as objectively as possible. Think about how people will be affected by each approach. Eliminate the solutions that will likely make the problem worse. Then examine the remaining solutions. Which one will benefit the most people? Will that one hurt someone else? Do the benefits outweigh the costs? Lead the person with whom the decision lies through this analysis and let them choose a course of action. It is possible that the person may tell you that they will solve the problem the way you suggest just to shut you up, so be aware of that. Try to get the person to buy into the solution. If no good solution can be found try brainstorming again. It is possible that there is ''no'' good solution though, and the person may be faced with nothing but bad choices. The goal here is to find the ''best'' solution, not necessarily a ''good'' solution.
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<!-- 6. Explain how to make a referral to a professional counselor or pastor. -->
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When your friend is facing a crisis that is too big for you to handle, you need to refer him to someone with professional training. Doing this is ''not'' abandoning your friend, but rather, recognizing that his problems are beyond your ability to help. There are four steps in making a referral:
 +
 
 +
<!--T:36-->
 +
;Prepare your friend: Before you can prepare your friend, you are going to need a lot of information about the services professional offers and have a concrete understanding of how it can help. Then you need to share that information with your friend. Assure your friend that seeking professional help is not a sign of weakness. Rather, it is often the most effective and least painful path to recovery.
 +
;Get your friend's participation: The decision to see a professional belongs to your friend, not to you. Do not pressure your friend into making this decision. It may take some getting used to, and the decision might take a long time to make.
 +
;Prepare the professional: Once your friend has decided to see the professional, you should call and talk to them. Do not make the appointment for your friend. Ideally your friend should to that for himself, but if the situation is especially urgent, you might make the appointment for your friend yourself. When you speak to the professional, tell them as much as you are comfortable about the situation, and why you think the referral is important. The more the counselor knows about the problem, the better able he will be to help. Make sure that the things you have told your friend about the professional hold true, and ask if they think they can really help.
 +
 
 +
<!--T:37-->
 +
;Follow up: After your friend's first appointment, ask how it went. You do not need to pry into the details of the session, but you should certainly ask if there is anything you can do to help your friend. Your continued support can help ensure a positive outcome.
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The point of this requirement is for the individual to examine his own reasons for wanting to help someone. Unfortunately, there are many more bad reasons to want to get involved than there are good reasons. The only valid reason to get involved is out of love. Invalid reasons include curiosity, the desire to gossip, the desire to feel better about oneself for helping, or out of a sense of wanting to control the other person's life. Sometimes people think that their friends cannot get themselves out of their mess without their help. There are almost certainly more invalid reasons for getting involved than those listed here. But that doesn't mean you should not get involved. Just be sure you are doing so for the right reason!
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==Historical Note== <!--T:39-->
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This honor was previously called Crisis Intervention. In 2009 it was renamed Conflict Resolution and somewhat rewritten. Much of it is the same as before, but there are some major differences.
 +
 
 +
== References == <!--T:41-->
 +
*''How to Help a Friend'' (second edition) by Paul Welter, Tyndale House, Wheaton, Illinois (1991)
 +
*''Christ-Centered Caring'' by Ronaele Whittington, AdventSource, Lincoln, Nebraska (1990)
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* [http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newLDR_81.htm Mind Tools: Conflict Resolution]
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Latest revision as of 19:25, 1 January 2023

Other languages:
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Conflict Resolution

Skill Level

3

Year

2005

Version

19.05.2024

Approval authority

General Conference

ADRA Conflict Resolution AY Honor.png
Conflict Resolution
ADRA
Skill Level
123
Approval authority
General Conference
Year of Introduction
2005
See also
ADRA Master Award


 This honor is available only to clubs outside the North American Division. For those inside the North American Division, use the Crisis Intervention honor instead.


1

Explain how Christ encouraged people in conflict in the following Bible stories. Identify the nature of the conflict or human needs in each story that you explain.



1a

John 8:1-11 (Mary Magdalene)




1But Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. 2At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. 3The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 4and said to Jesus, "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?" 6They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. 7When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." 8Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

9At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"

11"No one, sir," she said.

"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."
— John 8:1-11 (NIV)

The woman in this story was Mary Magdalene, and she was certainly experiencing a crisis. Not only was she publicly shamed, but her very life was threatened. The trap laid by the Pharisees here was that Mosaic Law called for the execution of an adultress, but under Roman Law, the decision to execute was reserved for the Roman governors. If Jesus were to agree that she should be executed, they would have turned Him in to the Roman authorities for usurping their authority. But if He disagreed with the death sentence, they would have "proven" that he did not respect Mosaic Law.

Jesus saw this trap immediately, but His main concern was not for himself but for Mary Magdalene. Yes, she had sinned, but so have we all, and His mission was to save sinners. Jesus extricated Himself from the trap while showing her great tenderness and compassion. His writing in the dirt was a list of "secret" sins committed by her accusers. He continued outlining these sins until all the accusers drifted away, eager for their own sins to be kept secret.

Finally, He turned to Mary, counseled her to leave her life of sin and granted her forgiveness. She followed Him devoutly after this incident, washing His feet with perfume at the home of Simon, and standing at the foot of the cross during the crucifixion. She was the first person to see Him after the resurrection.


1b

Matthew 18:1-6 (Disciples – Greatest in Kingdom in Heaven)




1At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?"

2He called a little child and had him stand among them. 3And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

5"And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. 6But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.
— Matthew 18:1-6 (NIV)

The people in crisis in this verse are the disciples, only they did not realize that they were in any danger. They were looking for Jesus to settle their disagreement over which of them was the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Their arrogance and pride were threatening their very salvation!

Jesus clearly pointed their error out to them in a most non-threatening way. When we see someone we love on a course to destruction, it is our duty to try to set them straight as well. However, the way we do this is just as important as the decision to do it. Jesus did not jump up and down and scream, nor did He insult His disciples and tell them they were ruining their lives (even if they were). Rather, He gently pointed out the way they should have been acting and admonished them to follow the example He set before them.


1c

1 Kings 3:16-28 (Solomon and the Baby)



Now two prostitutes came to the king and stood before him. One of them said, "My lord, this woman and I live in the same house. I had a baby while she was there with me. The third day after my child was born, this woman also had a baby. We were alone; there was no one in the house but the two of us.

"During the night this woman's son died because she lay on him. So she got up in the middle of the night and took my son from my side while I your servant was asleep. She put him by her breast and put her dead son by my breast. The next morning, I got up to nurse my son—and he was dead! But when I looked at him closely in the morning light, I saw that it wasn't the son I had borne."

The other woman said, "No! The living one is my son; the dead one is yours."

But the first one insisted, "No! The dead one is yours; the living one is mine." And so they argued before the king.

The king said, "This one says, 'My son is alive and your son is dead,' while that one says, 'No! Your son is dead and mine is alive.' "

Then the king said, "Bring me a sword." So they brought a sword for the king. He then gave an order: "Cut the living child in two and give half to one and half to the other."

The woman whose son was alive was filled with compassion for her son and said to the king, "Please, my lord, give her the living baby! Don't kill him!"

But the other said, "Neither I nor you shall have him. Cut him in two!"

Then the king gave his ruling: "Give the living baby to the first woman. Do not kill him; she is his mother."

When all Israel heard the verdict the king had given, they held the king in awe, because they saw that he had wisdom from God to administer justice.
— 1 Kings 3:16-28 (NIV)

This story is a primary reason Solomon was considered the wisest man to ever live. By setting up a scenario that forced both mothers to choose he deduced which was the true mother.



2

Discuss relationship, identity, racial, and cultural conflicts that teenagers in your community face today. (i.e. Relationship with parents, self esteem, friendships).


Teenagers are humans (contrary to some rumours) and therefore are subject to the same human needs as shown on the pyramid. However, as people in transition to an adult world, teenagers face additional decisions and challenges. With less experience in handling crisis situations than older people, teenagers may need to learn tools and skills to cope with life. Families are also comprised of humans who must function in relationships with each other. Families with teenagers are in for an interesting time as their teenagers grow up, leave home, study, find love and enter the workforce.

Once they get into a discussion, Teenagers will, however, focus on the human needs that are most pressing for them.

Discussion topics may include:

  • Divorce and family recombinations that place stress on family members
  • Decisions about school and career
  • Job loss and economic crisis in the family
  • Dating and romance
  • Self esteem challenges
  • Suicide thoughts
  • Peer pressure to try illegal, unhealthy or immoral things
  • Family violence and other types of abuse
  • Loss of a family member or loved one
  • etc

Often in any crisis whether it be a wide area disaster or the loss of a close family member the emotional crisis can be devastating to an individual. Not all people are emotionally equipped to react and continue to even function when facing what many would call an overwhelming situation. For these people immediate assistance is needed as they may have frozen themselves in a dangerous location, may become depressed even to the point of suicidal or may react in outrage and violent fashion.

To help to bring these reactions to a close or to a point controllable first the person must be helped to a place physically and mentally where they are not in immediate danger and they must be helped to realize this. In the case of the loss of a parent this may mean that the teen is helped to realize that they have many friends, and family, a community that will help them to go on and provide for their needs.

The human needs of any individual start with the same basics: shelter, water, and food. As Christians we recognize the need first for God and our relationship with Him and will remind those we help to keep this need first in all things. Beyond these basic needs there are possibly physical, medical, and emotional support needs that will be considered. A person injured in the fire that has destroyed his home needs medical attention before he needs emotional support (although the two may come nearly simultaneously at times). In professional occupations that deal with high stress matters or regular human suffering the emotional support to follow is most often called Critical Incident Stress Debriefing. This is a form of counseling that is important not only to professionals like firefighters but also to families and communities in need.

The stress of an incident can be overwhelming and may manifest itself some great time later or be a fixture in a person's actions and outlook to life. Although not all people are affected by such stress it is best to see to the potential needs of a person in crisis to avert the possible self destruction that may come. In this we consider not only what a person says they are feeling and facing, not only what they have gone through, but in the long term what they are like today vs. the person they were before their crisis.

In immediate intervention you will be a shoulder to lean on, someone to offer support, to be yelled at, to be cried to. You will offer encouragement and help to arrange for those basic needs of shelter, water, and food. You will report to your "supervisor" in intervention any issue you observe that may need to be referred to professional counseling. You will be a friend.

Families face a variety of crisis situations and some things that some may not consider to be a crisis can be devastating. For this purpose we will list common crisis situations:

  • House fire
  • Death of a loved one
  • Loss of income
  • Terminal disease
  • Birth Defects
  • Multiple Births (quintuplets for example, imagine five kids at one time could be stressful)
  • Serious Injury
  • Natural Disaster



3

Describe types of human needs and give a real-life example of each.


Maslow's hierarchy of needs

Maslow's hierarchy of needs is often depicted as a pyramid consisting of five levels: the four lower levels are grouped together as being associated with Physiological needs, while the top level is termed growth needs associated with psychological needs. Deficiency needs must be met first. Once these are met, seeking to satisfy growth needs drives personal growth. The higher needs in this hierarchy only come into focus when the lower needs in the pyramid are satisfied. Once an individual has moved upwards to the next level, needs in the lower level will no longer be prioritized. If a lower set of needs is no longer being met, the individual will temporarily re-prioritize those needs by focusing attention on the unfulfilled needs, but will not permanently regress to the lower level. For instance, a businessman at the esteem level who is diagnosed with cancer will spend a great deal of time concentrating on his health (physiological needs), but will continue to value his work performance (esteem needs) and will likely return to work during periods of remission.


4

What is active listening? Practice active listening by role playing conflicts noted in #2.


When interacting, people often are not listening attentively to one another. They may be distracted, thinking about other things, or thinking about what they are going to say next, (the latter case is particularly true in conflict situations or disagreements).

Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others. It focuses attention on the speaker. Suspending one’s own frame of reference and suspending judgment are important in order to fully attend to the speaker.

It is important to observe the other person's behavior and body language. Having heard, the listener may then paraphrase the speaker’s words. It is important to note that the listener is not necessarily agreeing with the speaker—simply stating what was said. In emotionally charged communications, the listener may listen for feelings. Thus, rather than merely repeating what the speaker has said, the active listener might describe the underlying emotion (“you seem to feel angry” or “you seem to feel frustrated, is that because…?”).

Individuals in conflict often contradict one another. This has the effect of denying the validity of the other person’s position. Either party may react defensively, and they may lash out or withdraw. On the other hand, if one finds that the other partly understands, an atmosphere of cooperation can be created. This increases the possibility of collaborating and resolving the conflict.


5

Apply the following method of conflict resolution to an example in #2.


5a

Set the scene


When setting the scene the two parties in conflict come together. It is important to listen to the other side without interjecting defenses of your own position. Otherwise this will descend into an argument and nothing will be resolved. Use active listening techniques, meaning you repeat your understanding of what has just been said to you. If your understanding is incorrect, the person whose views you have misconstrued will let you know. Be careful that active listening does not become arguing.

Pay special attention to the interests of the other party. Find out what their concerns are. Keep in mind that they may have valid objections to the solution you wish to put forward, and that it is very possible that you yourself could be wrong.

When presenting your side of the story emphasize that you are relating your perception of the problem. The goal here is to get the other party to recognize your concerns and interests.


5b

Gather information


Both sides have presented their perception of the problem and have stated their interests and goals. Now it is time to explore these viewpoints.


5c

Identify the problem


In this phase you are trying to clarify exactly what the problem is. It is very possible that up to this point the two parties have been arguing over two different issues. Try to come up with a mutually agreed statement of the problem.


5d

Brainstorm solutions


Once the parties have agreed on a definition of the problem, it is time to start putting out possible solutions. No solution should be judged at this point, as doing so will inhibit the flow of ideas. Write every idea down, no matter how crazy it seems. By not judging the solutions at this point, the floor is open to everyone present. Be sure that everyone there is engaged and is presenting ideas. The less assertive will resist this, especially if ideas are being shot down as they are presented.


5e

Negotiate a solution.


Use the method outlined in the previous requirement. Once you have come up with several solutions, evaluate them as objectively as possible. Think about how people will be affected by each approach. Eliminate the solutions that will likely make the problem worse. Then examine the remaining solutions. Which one will benefit the most people? Will that one hurt someone else? Do the benefits outweigh the costs? Lead the person with whom the decision lies through this analysis and let them choose a course of action. It is possible that the person may tell you that they will solve the problem the way you suggest just to shut you up, so be aware of that. Try to get the person to buy into the solution. If no good solution can be found try brainstorming again. It is possible that there is no good solution though, and the person may be faced with nothing but bad choices. The goal here is to find the best solution, not necessarily a good solution.



6

Explain how to make a referral to a professional counselor or pastor.


When your friend is facing a crisis that is too big for you to handle, you need to refer him to someone with professional training. Doing this is not abandoning your friend, but rather, recognizing that his problems are beyond your ability to help. There are four steps in making a referral:

Prepare your friend
Before you can prepare your friend, you are going to need a lot of information about the services professional offers and have a concrete understanding of how it can help. Then you need to share that information with your friend. Assure your friend that seeking professional help is not a sign of weakness. Rather, it is often the most effective and least painful path to recovery.
Get your friend's participation
The decision to see a professional belongs to your friend, not to you. Do not pressure your friend into making this decision. It may take some getting used to, and the decision might take a long time to make.
Prepare the professional
Once your friend has decided to see the professional, you should call and talk to them. Do not make the appointment for your friend. Ideally your friend should to that for himself, but if the situation is especially urgent, you might make the appointment for your friend yourself. When you speak to the professional, tell them as much as you are comfortable about the situation, and why you think the referral is important. The more the counselor knows about the problem, the better able he will be to help. Make sure that the things you have told your friend about the professional hold true, and ask if they think they can really help.
Follow up
After your friend's first appointment, ask how it went. You do not need to pry into the details of the session, but you should certainly ask if there is anything you can do to help your friend. Your continued support can help ensure a positive outcome.



7

Discuss your own motives for wanting to help your friends when they face conflict. What about strangers?


The point of this requirement is for the individual to examine his own reasons for wanting to help someone. Unfortunately, there are many more bad reasons to want to get involved than there are good reasons. The only valid reason to get involved is out of love. Invalid reasons include curiosity, the desire to gossip, the desire to feel better about oneself for helping, or out of a sense of wanting to control the other person's life. Sometimes people think that their friends cannot get themselves out of their mess without their help. There are almost certainly more invalid reasons for getting involved than those listed here. But that doesn't mean you should not get involved. Just be sure you are doing so for the right reason!



Historical Note

This honor was previously called Crisis Intervention. In 2009 it was renamed Conflict Resolution and somewhat rewritten. Much of it is the same as before, but there are some major differences.

References

  • How to Help a Friend (second edition) by Paul Welter, Tyndale House, Wheaton, Illinois (1991)
  • Christ-Centered Caring by Ronaele Whittington, AdventSource, Lincoln, Nebraska (1990)
  • Mind Tools: Conflict Resolution
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